weddingrisk

My mom and I went to a big ol’ hotel bridal expo at the local Sheraton this past Sunday. It was actually lots of fun, though I’m not sure how ultimately useful. I got to try lots of slivers of wedding cake (Verdict: Far too sweet) and get a bit more information about various “wedding staples” (is a videographer a staple? These folks seem to think so). Again, I think the trick to enjoying yourself in the face of the Wedding Industrial Complex is to internalize a couple of main philosophies:

1. Whatever everyone else wants to do is fine by me. I mean, really, if some bride-to-be (or her mom) simply must have a baby picture montage playing on a projection screen at her reception (this was very earnestly pitched to me. What would be far more elucidating is showing what B and I looked like at various key years, since when I was a baby, he was a bona fide school-ager. I did not bring this up.) that doesn’t, and shouldn’t, affect me one way or the other.

2. Be nice.

Another treat was running into the mother of a friend of mine, who runs Southern Bride and Groom. It was lovely to chat with her, and really made the whole experience for both of us.

At the sign-in desk, each of us future brides was given a bright pink circle with our wedding month written in swirled cursive, a sticker to wear so that “vendors don’t have to keep asking you when you’re getting married.” It’s a reasonable idea, though they might have suggested I write-in the year, as I kept getting comments from [male] vendor representatives. “It’s not this October, is it?” one tux representative lobbed at me, much to the giggly amusement of his peers.

Date: 10/31/2009
Halloween doesn’t hold any particular significance to either of us, but we fell a little in love with a venue and that’s the date they had available, so the 31st it is.

Venue: Check

Dress: Yup
Story to come.

Attendants (Bridesmaids): 10
Some have expressed concern about the large number, but the more the merrier I say.

Chuppa Holders: In progress

Bridesmaids’ dresses: In progress
I have - like - 12 dresses enroute to my house, a fact which probably has my credit card company amused, especially since I think for the past two billing cycles, all I’ve charged is an Arby’s roast beef sandwich (what? I like those…I’m in grad school…shut up!).

Flowers: Partial
JLQ’s mom has offered to plant us some rows of zinnias - lovely gesture, lovely flower

Up next: Photographer
Added to the issue of trying to stay within our budget, and finding someone with good aesthetics (no boobs+bouquets shots, please), it seems that the date might be an issue as well. Just got an email from a potential nicely informing me that many photographers like to spend Halloween with their families.

LRB was joking that at the rate we’re going, there’s not going to be anything left to plan next year. I think we’re doing well, but there’s tons left to figure out, some fun, (cakes!) some not so fun (tents). Interestingly, I’m not someone who has been planning her wedding since childhood. I’ve only started thinking about weddings recently, mostly because my friends have started getting married. So I didn’t plan this all out ahead of time. I have noticed that I’m pretty definite about the plans we’ve made. Once we decided, on the venue, for example, I felt like all other options were summarily erased. That’s also how I felt about my dress. This is good because it has basically eliminated second guessing and obsessing (is that a collective sigh of relief I hear, dear friends?) but it also has caused some M+B squabbles, as I get too attached to various brainstorms and become…intractable. Do not feel too sorry for B, however, he can hold his own.

So far, so good on the dress front. I got a lovely call from a certain JLQ who informed me that she had found the attendant dresses pictured below in a local mall and that not only were they very flattering, they were also on mega-sale. I rushed to the mall (and got heinously lost in Raleigh - somehow while trying to get to Crabtree, I ended up by Peace College) to have a look. The picture doesn’t really do these justice. They have a really nice raw-silk nub to them and as MHB so nicely put it, “they’re really well constructed.” I put all the ones I could find in the store on hold and sent around the following survey to gauge the collective reaction of my (uh, many) attendants:*

Potential Dress Survey
Select one answer and give your rationale, if necessary (IE if you are unenthusiastic, please explain).
1. Yay!
2. Yikes!
3. Sigh…fine.
4. The economy is tanking and you’re emailing me about dresses for your wedding in a year?!

The reaction was all positive, (particularly since both dresses are in the running - I don’t care so much about uniform style as uniform color) so last night I placed a big ole online order for the locals. Non locals ordered online as well. The only brief moment of drama came when one of the sizes I needed was sold out online (these are disappearing, hence the quick action). Rather than throw a tantrum, I used an online feature to help me locate the dress in a store. The only place in the country that still has the size, color, and style in-stock was in…Santa Monica, CA. I called at around 11:45pm east coast time and am having the dress sent here. “You’re like McGiver,” said ERM. A Bridezilla McGiver, maybe.

* “You better not start calling them your girls,” yelled my sister.